The move from Southern California to a small town in North Carolina presented our family with a few adjustment challenges. Wanting to soak up local culture led us to discover a hilarious morning radio program. Ah…John Boy and Billy- can’t get much more southern than that. We had to listen–How could we not?
I think the first time I fell in love with John Boy and Billy was when I heard their spoof on the condition of “lyricosis.”
To clear up any confusion, the Urban Dictionary defines lyricosis as “a debilitating disease wherein an individual consistently hears (and sings) the incorrect lyrics to songs”. (Also known as Chronic Lyricosis.)
CORRECT: I’ve got two tickets to paradise. –Eddie Money
INCORRECT: I’ve got two chickens to paralyze. –John Boy
CORRECT: Takin’ care of business, everyday. –Bachman-Turner Overdrive
INCORRECT: Making Karen Biscuits, everyday-John Boy
CORRECT: Hold me closer tiny dancer. -Elton John
INCORRECT: Hold me closer, Tony Danza-John Boy
Oh, and then there is his Christmas Album…
Chestnuts roasting on an open fire. Jack Frost nipping at your nose.
Chipmunks roasting on an open fire. Jet frogs ripping at your clothes.-John Boy
Haha! Oh, man, I can do this all day!
People who suffer from lyricosis love to sing their little hearts out. They aren’t suffering from it…you are. And if you opt to hold an intervention, be prepared. They get pretty defensive. They’ve been singing it that way for years and they’re not going to go down without a fight! They just don’t realize how ridiculous they sound to those of us who know the actual words to the song.
So funny! But have you ever thought about the warped and dangerous information our kids hear regarding sex?
- Sex is no big deal.
- Everyone is doing it.
- It’s natural and normal for kids to experiment with sex.
- Kids are going to have sex no matter what, so let’s just teach them to be safe.
These messages are outrageous! Unfortunately kids don’t always recognize the errors because loving adults have chosen to remain quiet and haven’t taught them the truth.
How about you? Have you instilled the Biblical truth of sex in your child’s heart? Have you taught her that sex has a beautiful design by the greatest inventor of all time? God invented sex but he also ordained it. His Word teaches us that sex is to remain within the boundaries that keep us safe physically, emotionally and spiritually—Marriage.
For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality. –I Thessalonians 4:3
Before you send your young child out into the world, teach him the correct lyrics to the song. Help him learn to recognize the mistakes so that when he hears the inaccuracy, it sounds ridiculous to him.